Today was an emotionally challenging day in business and I felt led to write this blog. I call this piece:
It Saddens Me
It saddens me that we cannot all hold hands and sing sunshine songs beneath the rainbow’s gaze.
But instead, I sing a freedom song in order to stop being a “Get Out” slave.
It saddens me when so called friends and business associates walked away.
It left me on life support struggling to fight another day.
It saddens me that the borrower becomes indebted to the lender
Some borrowers have to change addresses and return to sender
It saddens me when I cannot seem to make a way
But as long as it looks good on Facebook, everything is okay
It saddens me some friendships have curfews
And they turn around and say they really did not mean to hurt you
It saddens me when I am the only person I can trust
Because you can’t cope or you simply had enough
It saddens me to see fairweather friends make £8,000 from your generosity
But will not offer a seed into your business due their ego’s being a celebrity
It sadden me that you think you can speak to me in a certain way
And be foolish enough to think I will not have nothing to say
It saddens me when you don’t return my calls
Acting like we never existed at all
It saddens me that you call me aggressive, its just too much or over sensitive
When inside me I have so much more positivity to give
It saddens me when the colour of my melanin
Mean that I can not longer win
It saddens me when I am not paid my worth
While you go on holiday, buy books and leave me digging in the dirt
It saddens me on award night we can be the main token
Yet we come back home, alone, broke and broken
It saddens me those who commit suicide
Because they never really felt they were alive inside
It saddens me that Oprah does not return my tweets
Especially when I dreamt of her and I in an interview last week
With a heavy heart, I must now pack a suitcase and begin to move on to a better mental space. For too long I have been feeling displaced. For if we change our minds, we change our lives and I want to feel alright, even if it’s just for tonight. I’ll pack up my tears that i’ve dusted off over the years and release them into a healing light because my goal is to be out of sight.
It gladdens me that you would take the time to read, something that would eventually set my soul free.
God is love.
Written by Winsome Duncan 7th April 2017.